Final destination?

It’s a well known fact by anyone who tries to lose weight, that you can’t go on forever. At a certain moment you reach a point that you get stuck. Sometimes you get stuck for a little while. As if your body has to adjust to that new level and needs a little break before going on further on the journey. During my weight loss journey, I have had several of those moments. Moments where for some weeks I kept the same weight, although I did not really changed my habits. And then, after a week or two, three, I started losing weight again. As if my weight loss is a train ride, where you have to stop in several stations to wait a little before continuing the journey.

This time it’s different. I feel like I’m stuck at this point. Did I reach my final destination? Is the journey done? For two months now, I keep dancing around a certain weight. I reach my bottom weight, I keep it for a couple of days and after that I gain two-three-four pounds before getting back to the weight.

Of course, I can think of a million reasons for which I get stuck at this point. I can tell myself it’s winter time, it’s getting cold outside and I feel a bigger need of some warm comfort food at noon, instead of only eating my salad. There are the festivities of the end of the year that come with way to many delicious treats that I just don’t want to refuse all. And yes, there were and are some really nice moments with friends on which I eat a little too much and a little too unhealthy. And I must admit, shamefully, that I quit swimming.

So the only one to blame for the long delay is me, myself and I. But you know what, I’ve been on this journey for almost two years now. Since I started on january, 18th, 2017, I lost 95 lbs. Yes, I admit, secretly I hoped to lose 100 lbs before january,18th but I guess it won’t happen. And that’s fine. I know I will reach that point one day, maybe a bit later that I hoped for, and maybe, who knows, I will never reach it, and it doesn’t even bother me whether I reach it or not.

I changed my goals. For two years now, my main goal was to lose weight. Since a couple of weeks, I realise that my main goal isn’t losing weight anymore. My main goal has shifted. Priority now is to stay in this station. Maybe, when spring is arriving, that I will set for a new journey. Maybe I will find the courage once again to be a little stricter on myself, and find the way back to the swimming pool, or even the gym. But for now I’m fine at where I am right now. I feel great, I achieved a big deal and I feel proud of myself. Every now and then I look in the mirror and I’m happy, actually happy with what I see in the mirror. And isn’t that, after all, the whole reason why I did it?

 

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